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#51
11-25-2008, 09:30 AM
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Gays with a Shotgun
Two lovers fall on hard times and decided to rob a bank together.
The first lover plans the robbery and goes over the plan with the second lover in great detail. The robbery begins. The first lover drives up in front of the bank, stops the car and says to the other lover, "I want to make absolutely sure you understand the plan. You are supposed to be in and out of the bank in no more than three minutes with the cash. Do you understand the plan?" "Perfectly," he said. He goes in the bank with a shotgun while the other waits in the getaway car. One minute passes, two minutes pass...seven minutes pass - and the first lover is really stressing out. Finally, the bank doors burst open and out he comes. He's got a safe wrapped up in rope and is dragging it to the car. About the time he gets the safe in the trunk of the car, the bank doors burst open again with the security guard coming out. The guard's pants and underwear are down around his ankles while he is firing his weapon. As the guys are getting away, the first lover says "I thought you understood the plan!" The second lover while sitting on his shotgun says, "I did! I did exactly what you said!" "No, you idiot," he replied. "You got it all mixed up. I said tie up the GUARD and blow the SAFE!" 
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#54
11-25-2008, 11:31 AM
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Offensive..
Ive never onced laughed at a dead baby joke, however.. and maybe this says *alot* about me..
Ive laughed at *ALOT* of black jokes... so.. #1 Do you guys remember the black guy from the TV show the Jetsons?! No?! ME EITHER!!! DOESNT THE FUTURE LOOK GREAT!!!! #2 Two gay guys are walking on the beach and they find a Lamp.. rub it and out flys a Genie.. he is just about to go into his schpeel about giving 3 wishes when he stops and goes Wait.. are you two guys gay together?? After they reply yes, the genie says, Ok.. Well, ill make a deal... ill give each of you, one wish and one wish only. They both talk it over and accept the deal and the first guy immediatley uses his wish.. he says, Id love to have a 100 room gay-sex mansion.. Poof..they arrive in a 100 room gay sex mansion.. they are doing it in every room, all night long.. exausted.. they both fall asleep.. The next thing they know.. their front door is kicked down and a bunch of KKK members find them naked in their rooms... Confused, One asks the other why all the men are here, and what the rope is about... The other guy says, well... My wish was that we both be hung like black men. #3 Why cant Hellen Keller drive? She's a woman #4 What long and really hard for a black man? The first grade #5 What does F.U.B.U stand for? Farmers Used-to Buy Us I have a million of these as they seem to be the only jokes I can remember. Marcus
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#55
11-28-2008, 06:43 PM
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why don't ppl in thailand take a shower?
cause they wash up on shore
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-----------nothing i post is mine, get over it----------- RIP Joe TheSnake
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#56
12-02-2008, 04:00 PM
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Code:
Content, Pictures and Download links visible to registered users only. REGISTER NOW to access all areas that are invisible to non-members.
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"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote"...Ben Franklin
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#57
12-02-2008, 05:26 PM
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Fuckin' awesome! Last edited by AlaskaPhil : 12-02-2008 at 05:34 PM.
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#58
12-02-2008, 10:10 PM
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Code:
Content, Pictures and Download links visible to registered users only. REGISTER NOW to access all areas that are invisible to non-members. please post in correct forum: http://drunkenstepfather.com/forum/s...ead.php?t=2212 the Funny Pictures - If they made you laff post it here!
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"i just LOVE to play my clarinet, when i get better, it will play actual notes, not just the bubbling sounds it currently emanates". -doug benson Quote:
Quote:
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#59
12-02-2008, 10:51 PM
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A plane is decreasing speed rapidly downward, the pilot gets on the intercom and says "i'm sorry it had to come to this folks, but we're gonna have to let some of the luggage go''...the plane continues to decrease speed. Again you hear the pilot over the intercom ''i hate to have to do this, but now we're gonna have to start releasing passengers by alphabet order beginning with the letter 'A!'... AFRICANS, ANY AFRICANS!?... No one answers 'B!' BLACKS ANY BLACKS?! again, silence. 'C!' COLORED PEOPLE, ANY COLORED PEOPLE!?...silence. A black boy in the back turns to his mom and says 'but mom, arent we africans, black, and colored? The mom turns to her son and says "yes son, but today we r NIGGERS so the Mexicans go first"..The little black boy turns to a little Mexican kid sitting next to him and laughs! The Mexican kid laughs back and says fuck you ****** ! 2day Im a WETBACK!
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#60
12-02-2008, 10:58 PM
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^^I think that joke is over 20 years old. It's not funny and it's barley offensive.
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