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  #9171  
Old 09-03-2008, 09:38 AM
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towdog towdog is offline
So special, you feel it in your nuts.
 

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If you cough, sneeze, sigh, or yawn, do it not loud but privately; and speak not in your yawning, but put your handkerchief or hand before your face and turn aside.

George Washington
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  #9172  
Old 09-03-2008, 09:43 AM
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Shasturbator Shasturbator is offline
jesus got drunk and molested me
 

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When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.

Jack Handey
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about a man and his horse
  #9173  
Old 09-03-2008, 12:26 PM
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Tablefor5 Tablefor5 is offline
A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished.
 

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Damn, I've been away a few days....I need to try and get back into the swing of DSF
  #9174  
Old 09-03-2008, 12:27 PM
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I can say Jap cuz I am a Jap! ...Jap jap jappity jap.lol
 

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not my links. always virus check.
  #9175  
Old 09-03-2008, 12:38 PM
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Shasturbator Shasturbator is offline
jesus got drunk and molested me
 

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If you're a horse, and someone gets on you, and falls off, and then gets right back on you, I think you should buck him off right away.

Jack Handey
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about a man and his horse
  #9176  
Old 09-03-2008, 12:54 PM
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towdog towdog is offline
So special, you feel it in your nuts.
 

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Sleep not when others speak, sit not when others stand, speak not when you should hold your peace, walk not when others stop.

George Washington
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  #9177  
Old 09-03-2008, 01:00 PM
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Shasturbator Shasturbator is offline
jesus got drunk and molested me
 

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If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.


Jack Handey
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  #9178  
Old 09-03-2008, 01:17 PM
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towdog towdog is offline
So special, you feel it in your nuts.
 

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Shake not the head, feet, or legs; roll not the eyes; lift not one eyebrow higher than the other; wry not the mouth; and bedew no man's face with your spittle by approaching too near him to speak.

George Washington
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  #9179  
Old 09-03-2008, 01:22 PM
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Shasturbator Shasturbator is offline
jesus got drunk and molested me
 

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The memories of my family outings are still a source of strength to me. I remember we'd all pile into the car - I forget what kind it was - and drive and drive. I'm not sure where we'd go, but I think there were some trees there. The smell of something was strong in the air as we played whatever sport we played. I remember a bigger, older guy we called "Dad." We'd eat some stuff, or not, and then I think we went home. I guess some things never leave you.

Jack Handey
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I once had every vag on DSF dripping wet reading an erotic story I posted...


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  #9180  
Old 09-03-2008, 01:31 PM
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towdog towdog is offline
So special, you feel it in your nuts.
 

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Shift not yourself in the sight of others nor gnaw your nails.

George Washington
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