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Reload this Page Stupid shit your Wife has done!

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  #11  
Old 02-03-2010, 07:15 PM
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I know my behavior can be... *erratic* sometimes
 
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Idiot.
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You should be so lucky to have Pobs mount you and destroy your mangina with his monster cock!
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Pobs= pimp
None of these links are mine.
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  #12  
Old 02-03-2010, 07:54 PM
underweardog underweardog is offline
the burning and itching has stopped
  

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Sorry to laugh but that is a helluva a story. Sorry you had to lose your cd collection but that is a one of a kind tale!
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  #13  
Old 02-03-2010, 10:05 PM
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strommsarnac strommsarnac is offline
i know more than you and i knew it before you did
  

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My wife opened her mouth and started speaking.

Just kidding. She's a redhead, so she also suffers from blond moments. Too many to remember.



However, my bitch sister actually called 5 minutes before my wife and I were to start taking our wedding vows wanting us to hold up the ceremony!!!! Understand, I got married in my father's back yard. The same house my dad had lived in for for almost 30 years and that all four of us kids grew up in. The same house that her husband had been too hundreds of times (his mom was a longtime friend of the family). He pretty much grew up in our house. Supposedly, they got lost on the 20 minute drive from their home. Literally, 4 fucking turns of the wheel.

I said NO! Somehow, she got there about 5 minutes after I hung up on her.

Then less than a year later she quit talking to my wife who was her best friend from high school. She decided that she couldn't be best friend's with my wife. She fucking set us up together! I still don't talk to her.
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  #14  
Old 02-04-2010, 10:10 AM
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Tablefor5 Tablefor5 is offline
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how do you get lost going to the house you grew up in?
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Random credits are almost as good as random rimjobs. You don't wanna ask for it, but if the opportunity arises, fucking go for it!!!
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  #15  
Old 02-04-2010, 10:34 AM
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I was at the cinema with a girl I was seeing at the time, we were watching Robin Hood - Men In Tights because there was fuck all else on and I thought it was funny.

Anyway, the bit at the beginning when 'Robin' escapes from the prison place thing and swims back to England and they're showing it like a kind of map with the red line where he's swam and all the countries are labelled by name so you know where he is and she asks me if "that's how pilots know where they are going, because all the countries have their name in big letters like the Hollywood sign'.

I said that it was EXACTLY how the pilots know where to go.
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  #16  
Old 02-04-2010, 07:03 PM
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Expletive Expletive is offline
Cluster-Bomb this MothaFucka!
  

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i'd kill for a dame like SRD's wife, i swear i'd kill for one like that. she's aces in my book.
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How about the part where "Old Ben" assfucks Leia, and blows it on her fucking cheek? He knew damn well who she was, but seemingly ignores it.:
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  #17  
Old 02-04-2010, 11:11 PM
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I normally can understand women who want to help, In this case...your a saint. I would have called the police to have me removed form the place in sheer terror of what I was going to do to her! 300 CD's scratched your name into them....I mean does she speak and breath at the same time? Still now I would not even laugh about it.
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That settles it. Pancakes for breakfast it is
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... On with the shenanigans.
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  #18  
Old 02-13-2010, 05:19 PM
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What part of "Buy the large bottle of Wiskey" Does she not understand????

WTF...
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Random credits are almost as good as random rimjobs. You don't wanna ask for it, but if the opportunity arises, fucking go for it!!!
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  #19  
Old 02-13-2010, 06:54 PM
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there's a lot of letters in that sentence...
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  #20  
Old 02-13-2010, 07:01 PM
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i have seen a vagina, and it was expensive
  

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I'm a huge comic book and scifi geek.
So, a few years ago, my now exwife is talking to me talking about how a friend hers who is very well off because of her husband invited us both to a convention in california, that her husband always goes to. She said. "I'll pay for your plane tickets, your hotel rooms, and youre registration, but I hate that stupid convention. Your husband can hang out with mine and we'll go shopping."

My wife said no.

She tells me about this while watching Cnn the following monday and was like "Yeah, so...apparently that convention was the one we were invited."
Can we say San Diego Comic Con?
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