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  #18741  
Old 07-01-2014, 08:03 PM
MEGADOUCHE
 

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Often, when I have to urinate, I pull my penis out of my pants first.
  #18742  
Old 07-02-2014, 12:22 PM
MadamMeow
 

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Lack of caffeine headaches are the worst when you don't like iced coffee.

It's almost 100 degrees out and I'm having hot coffee.
  #18743  
Old 07-02-2014, 05:54 PM
Foetus
 

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i dont
  #18744  
Old 07-02-2014, 09:50 PM
Woody8384 Woody8384 is offline
the burning and itching has stopped
  

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Just saw a random new pornstar on Naughty America today, Sovereign Syre. There doesn't seem to be anything discernibly unique about her but I find her absolutely irresistible. I must have her.
  #18745  
Old 07-03-2014, 05:32 AM
MEGADOUCHE
 

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She has sex for money. You might try that approach.
  #18746  
Old 07-04-2014, 03:31 PM
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ThatHaole ThatHaole is offline
I kill grownups for fun but for a lollipop, I'm gonna carve him up real nice
 

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ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!
ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!ThatHaole ain't your mother fucking puppet, fool!
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Or just fap in the darkness in a pool of his own tears and stench of defeat. It's worked so far.
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RIP Joe TheSNake. You will be missed brother.
  #18747  
Old 07-04-2014, 03:55 PM
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amtronic amtronic is offline
As envisaged, the amtronic now converts to 'hover' mode...
  

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amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.amtronic is swimming in the rep pool that we call life.
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How do you clean an LCD screen of uhh stuff that won't make streaks? I guess I shouldn't have let it dry.


.
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... as I hooked my gnarled finger thru her nipple
ring, and pulled her supple body toward mine ...
  #18748  
Old 07-04-2014, 05:35 PM
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The Godfather The Godfather is offline
I'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse.
 

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The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.The Godfather - neener, neener, neener has rep coming out the weiner.
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With streak free glass cleaner. I is smarts!
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Is this the END? ... or are we starting over?
  #18749  
Old 07-05-2014, 08:11 PM
MadamMeow
 

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Thank you dear "anonymous" ip asshole for making me change my google password. Considering I hate gmail with a passion, I don't know what you think I actually have in it besides my chrome south park background settings.
  #18750  
Old 07-05-2014, 09:44 PM
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strommsarnac strommsarnac is offline
i know more than you and i knew it before you did
  

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strommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warriorstrommsarnac is teaching others the way of the Post Warrior
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Thanks Madam/MRG..

He's 24. Let that sink in a bit.

OK, so after the ambulance ride to the ER and 3 hours of crappy ER chairs killing my back and neck, he was released. They didn't do any tests, just wrote up paperwork that he had an allergic reaction.

Then he says "I can't believe the teen behind the counter used her hand to scoop popcorn into bags and then got my hotdogs without washing off her hand".

WTF!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! "Dude, you fucking stood there watching her do both and didn't think to say a fucking word????!?!?!?!?!?"

Nope.

Fast forward three days and he goes to an allergist for a full test. Turns out, he's not even allergic to coconut. Not one little bit. Also turns out that according to Coco-Cola, even though Powerade contains MEDIUM CHAIN TRIGLYCERIDES (derived from coconut oil), it does not contain any proteins from coconut oil and therefore can not affect anyone allergic to coconuts.

OH MY GOD, sometimes my son is a dumbass. Alive, but a dumbass.

He is allergic to peanuts, almonds and hazelnuts. No other nut though. Whew.
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