Random thoughts thread Version 2.0 - DONE! - Page 1242 - The Drunken stepFORUM - A place to discuss your worthless opinions

amylikewhoa · #**12411** 05-07-2009, 06:24 PM

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On your lap!
I just sat on a wet bench

amylikewhoa · #**12412** 05-07-2009, 07:16 PM

I love being talked about to my face like I'm not standing there

scampr · #**12413** 05-07-2009, 09:21 PM

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I need a rim job

amylikewhoa · #**12414** 05-07-2009, 09:44 PM

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see n2

Boon · #**12415** 05-07-2009, 10:03 PM

I drove by a low class titty bar today. The marquee read "We have all pretty girls now."

Boon · #**12416** 05-07-2009, 10:04 PM

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I'm certain she would just lay there and pose for an imaginary camera.

Goat Gosselin · #**12417** 05-07-2009, 10:05 PM

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id flash some white

maxbailey · #**12418** 05-08-2009, 06:23 AM

For those who are interested, this is the first 32 or so pages of the 'Let's write a story' thread...

When Brenda was a street hooker, 'this will suck' said her dad, her dildo was (what is this) a dead squirrel. Sad, I'd say Randal was crying and then she touched Randal there, he yelled 'rape!' and he reacted by grabbing his bottle of viagra and taking many.
Will this end? 'Never!' viagra said.
Randal said that ' i'm telling mom and I'm gonna...'
Please end this?
'Not quite yet.'
How about now?
'No. . .too early' said the grasshopper, 'Time to Stop!'
Now its done? Truly doubt it.

Randal wanted more, reaching for his bean burrito purse, slowly, moving upward. 'Run, Forrest, Run!' Guiness enjoys, tasty.
Let this die? Okay, Randal Jr?
'This shit still is my favorite waste of time - ass to mouth, in a boat with a goat.'
'Touch my monkey?'
'Ask your mom, she certainly will.'
She declined also, but, just then this causes sadness and erectile dysfunction and bowel movements. Just give up and shit yourself in the car.

Driving to work, with no pants, 'Why in the world he fingered you, stupid douche.' With sweaty big man hands he killed Michael Phelps by accident, but I will not kiss my ass!
'You'll have to or I'll tell your hot mom this is old.'
'It's back Randal, in your ass.'
'Chupa mi verga es muy pequeno! Spoke the ancient midget.
Just then, from the kitchen, my dog farted in my face, which tasted kinda like spoiled pickles, making me puke.

'What's that?' I ask myself sarcastically, 'Randal touched my Mini like N2's?'
That's gross, but I liked it in my ass, smelled like poo and I like smelling N2's poo.
Squeezing, squinching, smelling, enjoying the hell that I made,
'Eat my ass!'
'No thank you'
'Do it now you fucking punter, Eat my ass!'
'Does not rhyme with my ass, anyway, I've got my love doughnuts.'

Mr. Brownfella is leaving his mark and hates sprinkles.
'I need some in da butt with some sprinkles and a dollup, buck Cherry buck, fuck, Mary, fuck.'
Hickory dickory dock, the mouse sat on a tuffet, not on a turbo'd Mini coop.
'Chopper! Sick balls! Sic semper tyrannis!!'
'What the fuck?'
Thus, ever, always, it is good that it's Friday and we can sell your soul to Jehovah's Witnesses and watch them start a fire with their pamphlets by burning the neighbor's wife's bush with a flamethrower, wearing only marshmallows on their cocks.

Then Moses said 'I'm Moses Malone, now blow me'
'Who's there, motherfucker?'
'Why, it's only a paper moon!'
'How do you sleep at night? With one eye?'
'With my balls in my hand, scratching, fondling, cupping. I always dream, punching, kicking, screaming, wondering if I am really straight, or slightly crooked, wearing one shoe on my ear, the other on my toaster oven's tray. I bake 'eat my ass' with a spoon, no, a spork made of tinfoil and barbed wire.'

Gatorade is awesome for rinsing out your filthy penis, 'semen semen semen, everybody loves semen in da butt, especially sperm banks'.

I have shit stains on my, in my eye from fistin' kraig-whatever-his-name-is with a boxer's right hook bitch, taped up fists.

Clay Aiken likes da big penis in his eye, but he also uses a turkey baster with a rubber glove and inseminates random women on the street using only a golf ball and a rusty pitchfork. Makes him complete his anal probing at the mall, proved that he actually really wasn't shitting live hamsters out his a-hole, they were gerbils, Richard Gere like, shaved, no claws.

'Alaskan King Crabs in my pants!'
'There are huge bugs crawling towards...'

Day old pizzacrusts make good dildos. Fixed. Carry on. Not old, stall the guards! I'll call them goats to distract them.

I don't like green eggs and tuna fish sandwich with blue buggers crawling on top.

Suddenly the Pope pooped his pants while in bed -ancient Catholic ritual involving little boys, sexy alter boys. Ass to mouth makes Pope happy, makes nun sad, leaves bad breath on your balls. Makes me feel, after my last anal gang raping, something wasnt completely normal, but then, tickling my fancy was a tiny little midget woman driving a mini, eating dolphin tuna.

'I smell fish, fish heads, fish, the fishy kind, green eggs suck, but my thumbs up your ass for 5 dollahs, makes you holler, squeal like a piggy piggy piggy.'
'I want bacon, shakin' into Macon.'

Gettin' the HIV results, Malcolm stood slowly, cocking his french fried potatoes, bacon cheese burger, slowly into his Doc Brown Delorean at 88 mph headed for 1955 at 1.21 gigawatts!!

In other news, three beavers exploded due to massive turd encrusted delights and defective, malfunctioning Sybians.

Meanwhile, in Kenya I shat upon a marathon runner's shoes and also his small piece of tofu dessert with bacon flavour raspberry sorbet and rainbow sprinkles of burning ass, slapped and floured, bitch was big!
'My, oh my, in her eye.'

I have a cheese wheel penis and a smelly.
'Does it, really?'
'Really, it does'
OK, its smelly stale french fries in the crack of my seat, ingrown ass hair on my foot.
'Eat my ass!'
'No thank you'
'Eat it now!'
'No' and then cannot be that crusty brown undies she wore today, threw them down and smelled them like minty turnips.

'Toss my salad with big tongs, You ...Dirty....Guy'
'How'd...you...know?'
'Smelled really bad.'

'I saw a boob it was' said Master Yoda, 'hmmm, yes, yes! Cumming! Yoda is!'

Lickin' chicken nuggets the dyslexic nun passed the bun. Then she sat on her muffet wondering why she couldn't stuff it, thats not right, turn it over.

thermos · #**12419** 05-08-2009, 10:09 AM

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hey faggot - do you have your selections ready yet? Don't make any slipshod choices either, this is serious internet bizness.

we need to start the poll - and Miss MamamaMaterial Girl only has until Tuesday to buy it.

SirLongFoot · #**12420** 05-08-2009, 10:12 AM

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I'll send you the selections. I'm straddling the line of picking something crazy, to satisfy the fucking perv that I am, and picking something she might actually like, and be a gentleman about it. Serious biz it is.

Faggot.