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You need an epic theme song. How about (to the theme of COPS)
Mega Douche, Mega Douche, whatcha gonna do?
Watcha gonna do when he comes on you.
Mega Douche, Mega Douche, whatcha gonna do?
Watcha gonna DOOOO-OOOOO!
A lot.
And while the song is playing, you would be running around jizzing on bitches.