ITT: Anonymous Confessions to DSF
 

Now that my noob ass found the right forum, let's do this. The powerful and mysterious Satan (his power is only exceeded by his mystery) has enabled anonymous posting, it's time to come clean.

Use the anonymoose button to reply to this thread, and tell us the most fucked up shit about your life. Then, the rest of us can attempt to credit it to forum posters. :D

If everyone jumps in we could learn a lot about each other, all while never knowing who the fuck we know about. If it takes off I will tell you all something I've never told anyone... (But you won't know its me, so suck it.)

I get hard while watching 2 Girls, 1 Cup.

Ok, this isn't super fucked up, but it was maybe the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to me. Many moons ago I was getting one of my first blowjobs from this girl on my folks sofa. Everything was great and then I got the feeling I was about to cum. Being a young man, I didn't give any warning and opened the flood gate, and low and behold, I pissed right in her mouth and all over the sofa. I still feel bad for that girl and always try to be nice when she calls me now.

I once fucked a goat




shit i forgot to make in anonymous

;)

This is not me.

My first wet dream came while I was on vacation with my best friend and his family in the 8th grade. The dream was terrible...I was on a cruise ship and Eddie Murphy was my friend. I got sucked off by one of his hoes and woke up with a crotch full of cum around 4 am. So fucking awkward trying to get up, stay silent and get changed without anyone noticing.

:wtf:

I love it when my gf tells me stories of the people shes fucked while I'm fucking her.

Nice one.

hahaha...

"fuck me like tom does...i mean did"

I just wonder if this dude was asking details: "tell me how big his cock was" or "did he eat your asshole as good as I do" or even "you're thinking of his balls banging against your ass, aren't you, you slut". So many questions unanswered...

How do you know it's a dude saying this?

Said gf, so I'm assuming its a dude. Or a dyke. Which is fine, unless you're as ugly as Chastity Bono. Quote of me from twitter, "Chastity Bono is now proof that ugly lesbians can become ugly men if they have enough money. Keep tryin, honey. You're still a dyke to me."

I had a long term sexual relationship with a married woman. Here's how i found out she was married.

(TLDR at the bottom if you dont want to read my novel)

Was out at a club. She was there with a friend. Friend went home but she stayed. I noticed her, noticed her friend leave too. Eventually struck up a convo with her. Cracked some jokes. We laughed and had fun. She was hot, a little older she looked to be about 30-32. BANGIN body. Club's closing and i told her my friend was having people over did she want to come over? *My freind always had small parties on the weekend so i was 90% sure i wasnt telling a lie but thought fuck it, if there's no party at least her and i will be out together and we'll find something to get into* She agrees. We are both fairly drunk. We leave and go to my friends for about an hour.

She wants to come to my apt but i told her some lie about why we couldnt - dont remember what it was - so she says we can go to her place. I'm driving her and she directs me to this high rise of 'loft' style condos. Really expensive shit. We walk in the front, past the doorman who knows her. She says hi, he gives me a strange look.

Elevator takes us up to one of the upper floors. The inside of her place is amazing. 2 floor 'loft' apt with a staircase in the middle and a huge deck and windows from the floor to the ceiling which is 25 feet up. Viking fridge and all that expensive shit. Place had to cost close to a mil. Didnt want to ask what she did for a living for fear of spoiling the mood.

Door shuts. We are all over each other. Clothes come off. We are fucking like rabbits. She asks if i want to do some E cuz she has some. Fuckin A yes. We rolled till probly 7 or 8 am. Fucked a couple more times during the night while we watched movies off and on. We finally pass out.

We wake up. Its around 1 or 2pm. I tell her i have to go. She said she would walk me out.

As i'm walking down the stairs i see all the pictures in frames on the wall. Her and some guy. Lots of pics. Pics i didnt see when we came in at night time. I ask her who the guy is.

She says 'My husband'.

WTFWTFWTF???! Huh? I said 'YOUR MARRIED?'. She holds up her hand with a wedding ring on it. I told her 'hey i never look at girls hands cuz at the places i go to theres never any married people there'. She said 'i never took my ring off, i cant believe you didnt see it'.

My mind is racing. i'm thinking of the door guy 1st off. She says she sells him weed he wont say anything. So we sit down so i can ask some questions. Sounds dumb but i am freaked out so i want answers.

She tells me that her husband is some CFO and he is out of town over 20 days out of each month. Their marriage is loveless. She barely sees him at all. I ask if she's done this before. She says no. I believe her. She says she knows he sleeps around but she looks the other way. Men have needs. Ultimately she is sad and lonely albeit rich but she's still lonely. She if forthcoming and honest with all details.

Stunned i go home to process.

We start to go out together a lot. I always stay at her place cuz her husband is literally never home and her place is fucking posh. I got over the husband thing pretty quick. I could see that she was doing the dutiful wife thing and was miserable. Shes a good woman.

We were together for a little over a year. We frequently told each other 'i love you'. I miss her to this day.

We split up cuz her husbands company shit canned a bunch of the execs and he was going to be in town now, all the time. He started his own tax prep company and was never out of town again. There was no way we could keep seeing each other. I hope that him being in town brought them back closer together.

I just want her to be happy.

TLDR - I met a hot chick. We fucked. I found out she was married. We talked it out. She was trapped in a miserable marriage with her husband sleeping with other women. Her and i had a 14 month relationship. We broke up. We never got caught.

ahhh the cesspool that is DSF. i want to read more stories that make me feel better about myself

I Am Dr.george Ali, A Director With The Union Bank Of Nigeria (u.b.n) Plc Lagos. I Came To Know Of You In My Private Search For A Reliable And Reputable Person To Handle This Confidential Transaction Which Involves The Transfer Of A Huge Sum Of Money To A Foreign Bank Account Requiring Maximum Confidence.

An American, Late Engineer Kelvin Michael's, An Oil Merchant/contractor With The Federal Government Of Nigeria, Until His Death Three Years Ago In A Ghastly Motor Accident, Banked With Us Here At Union Bank Of Nigeria Plc, Lagos, And Had A Closing Balance Of Us$33,725,000,000:00 Million Which The Bank Now Questionable Expect To Be Claimed By Kelvin's Next Of Kin Or Alternatively, Be Donated To A Discredited Trust Fund For Arms And Ammuninations At A Military War College Here In Nigeria.

Some Of My Trust Colleagues And I Now Seek Your Permission To Have You Standing As Next Of Kin To Late. Engineer Michael's, So That The Funds Will Be Released And Payed To Your Account As Next Of Kin.

Furnish Me With Your Confidential Phone,fax Numbers, Email Address, And Exclusive Banking Coordinates So That I Can Use These Information To Apply For The Release And Subsequent Transfer Of The Funds In Your Favour.

Yours Sincerely, Dr. George Ali

I've been waiting for this day my entire life.

I hate black people but i would bang a big tit and ass black girl any day

just one tit?

I once had sex with a 16 yr old co-worker.

How old were you when it happened? (you can post anon again to answer)

Who hasn't? :)

Same question!

I once got a 15 year old pregnant. I didn't know she was 15 (she told me she was 18, I was 19 at the time). I found out her age when her father almost killed me.

At least I had fun.

I like to bump threads.

I spend a lot of my day at work thinking about fucking our 19 year old receptionist up the ass.

So do I.

Wouldn't he report you?
-SrD

I am a 19 year old receptionist who spends all day thinking about being fucked in the ass. carry on.

Only if I took the tape off his mouth.

In the 2 years between my divorce and my current bf i went wild and had one night stands with about 5 guys. I feel like such a slutbag.

Hit me up girl!

5 guys? thats not that many.

didn't you go to college? i know freshman girls that have had 5 one night stands last semester alone

It is if it's all at once...

This is not MDC. I cornholed the Lincoln Tunnel. Again, this is not MDC.

Can someone tell me what ITT stands for? Thank You.

ITT stands for IN TOTAL TRUTH

not sure if you're trolling but I understand it as "in this thread"
e.g. itt: chicks with dicks holding bricks or what have you.