Leth would be about 2 or 2.5 hrs almost straight south of Calgary

If the shaved monkey walks upright and it is raining cats and frogs then the refridgerator will begin singing "O' Come All Ye Faithful" while Dr. Pepper checks Mrs. Butterworth for vaginal warts.

So I just discovered something in the office that so American. A moist ball (HA!) that licks the envelope for you! Sa-weeeeeeeeet!

You are having dinner with some foreign dignitaries and someone says something anti-American. You:

(A) Shoot him and create an international incident.

(B) Pretend you did not hear it and ask him to pass the sweet and sour shrimp.

You'd be surprised how many people say "A" -- but if you said "B," then you have the ability to make quick decisions on your feet. When you enroll at Ambassador Training Institute, you'll learn how to accept gifts graciously, how to propose toasts. You'll use phrases like: "Delighted to see you again!" "I'll ask the Secretary of State." and "Pass the sweet and sour shrimp."

what can I say....this place keeps me sane believe it or not...I'd be pulling my hair out due to boredom if it wasn't for DSF....I've gotten to know a few people on here pretty good as well..this place is great...

Ahh shit, when he gets all sappy like that it means he is gonna go out and offer the candy again!!!

Allright listen up! Unless it is a random fuckin thought I am gonna come over and close your friggin cock-taster for ya! Got it? Any fuckin questions sweet heart?

-said the spoon to the fork while the knife stabbed the steak

^^^ Spooning usually leads to forking...

wanna fork?

sorry Pen...couldn't help myself