I kill grownups for fun but for a lollipop, I'm gonna carve him up real nice
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: In Your Mom
Posts: 22,691
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Once anyone watches that video your mom did with the 7th division of the German Army for a pack or Marlboro Menthols, the rest of the Mom movies are just derivative
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RIP Joe TheSNake. You will be missed brother.
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The ex is pretty funny. She was 17 and a virgin and I was 27, when I met her, with perfect little perky B cups. I hadn't seen her for a while after we got divorced. Then one day she showed up at my house with a D cup and a nose job. Informs me she is stripping at Legs Diamond in NYC. Those were fun times. On my birthday, she rented a limo and invited a bunch of her stripper friends and me to a boxing match. It was the best night of my life. Something pretty cool about banging your ex wife in a limo, with no strings attached. She didn't have any sex with the other girls, but she kept pulling up their dresses or pulling down their shirts, telling them, show "snake" your tits. Doesn't she have great tits? And hey you two make out for snakes birthday. I went straight to work the next morning in the limo. I smelled of booze so bad the boss told me to go in the lounge and go to sleep
Now the ex wife emails once in a while telling me she loves me to much to just be casual fuck buddies. Stupid shit.
__________________ I am a sinner in the hands of an angry god
Quote:
Originally Posted by pisceschef
Too late. The siren song of skinny jeans and skittlerex lured him back to his people. We won't see him for another 3 months.
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Mine gets paid big money. Last I heard from her, some dude wanted to pay her all this cash to watch me fuck her. She told me I got to fuck her and she was going to pay me $800. Sounded to gay to me though, so I passed. She was pretty pissed.
__________________ I am a sinner in the hands of an angry god
Quote:
Originally Posted by pisceschef
Too late. The siren song of skinny jeans and skittlerex lured him back to his people. We won't see him for another 3 months.
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I think everyone, except the virgins from Phun and 4chan, would have some stories to contribute... I have 2 ex-wives and current wife to talk about, batshit crazy all of them!! And then there is me...oh well.
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I have a beautiful mind full of disgusting stuff.