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Reload this Page How long has it been since you had sex?

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  #131  
Old 03-02-2009, 07:39 PM
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jo_dile jo_dile is offline
I'm rollin with my pistol and my shotty
 

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Awww....I'm sorry. But at least it was some sex....
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  #132  
Old 03-02-2009, 07:42 PM
PANDAmonium PANDAmonium is offline
i live with my mom and have never seen a vagina
  

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Haha I guess this is true.

Another upside is that the boyfriend promised to give me as many back massages as I want ON COMMAND for the rest of the month. Bwahahahaha!
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  #133  
Old 03-02-2009, 07:51 PM
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Randal Graves Randal Graves is offline
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I can't believe guys negotiate for sex. I'd just jerk off if it came down to it.
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  #134  
Old 03-02-2009, 09:32 PM
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Kyle E. Coyote Kyle E. Coyote is offline
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Way too long. Somebody fuck me, please.

In all seriousness, I'm trying to lose weight before hitting the bar scene again. Getting out of the Corps I weighed in at 190, but balooned (I mean fucking BALOONED) to 270 because of a knee injury. Just over two months into the diet I'm hovering around 221.

Which brings me to my next point. You know what I hate even more than not getting laid? Lean-motherfucking-Cuisine.
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  #135  
Old 03-02-2009, 11:23 PM
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Randal Graves Randal Graves is offline
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chicken carbonara is the best lean cuisine ever.
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  #136  
Old 03-02-2009, 11:31 PM
PANDAmonium PANDAmonium is offline
i live with my mom and have never seen a vagina
  

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One thing that will make you lose weight like a fucking bulimic is the stomach flu. I had it for four days (I ate some green diner eggs but didn't question them because I'm gross and I'll eat pretty much anything unless it's PARSLEY EWWW!!) and I lost almost 20 pounds. I only weighed 112 to begin with. I am 5'11". I looked like Skeletor. Took me a few days' worth of competitive-speed eating to gain it all back.

I also hate Lean Cuisine because no matter how many of them you eat YOU WILL NEVER BE FULL. You should stick to rice and beans. That shit will fill you up in a second and it never really gets gross. You can dress it up with all sorts of things. When I was little I would put orange soda in my rice because I refused to eat anything that wasn't sweet and bubbly.
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  #137  
Old 03-02-2009, 11:57 PM
Noffy Noffy is offline
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Unfortunately jerking off isn't a replacement to sex for me. I need both! Fortunately been married 11 years and I don't have to wait for either. Instead of bargaining sex for a months worth of back rubs he should have just started with the back rub and a bit of snuggling and the will follow.
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  #138  
Old 03-03-2009, 12:01 AM
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Randal Graves Randal Graves is offline
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Or got her drunk.
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  #139  
Old 03-03-2009, 01:17 AM
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Fundamentals are a crutch for the talentless
  

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Roofie Colada for the lady, I'll have a water.
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  #140  
Old 03-03-2009, 08:24 AM
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Uhm, like 'eons' ago? lol Well, seriously, I am tad busy working, so am the poor guy I guess.
Last edited by pathill : 03-03-2009 at 08:26 AM.
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