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Join Date: Oct 2008
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Kissing - A Non-Gay Thread
I went on a date last night, and the girl had been talking about how she rejects dudes based on their ability to kiss as she has very high standards. I jokingly said that maybe it was she who couldn't kiss right, if the other guys were bad. Although I passed her little test later, she did this little thing she called a "lock". Basically, in mid kiss, she'd suck our lips together so we couldn't move. This would last for about three to four seconds each time she did it. Now my fucking lips are sore. On the other hand, I'm very interested to know how she sucks the peen.
Anyway, the point of this thread: what are some of your weird kissing experiences? The Drooler? The Cow Tongue? The Fish Mouth?
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Don't invite me to your house. Cause I'll fuck your mom.
I dont know if theres a name for this, but i once made out with a girl that had the biggest inside of her mouth ever. or like a normal tongue that contracted when her mouth was interlocked with mine. all i know is that i would be flipping my tongue around in there and hittin nothing. i had no idea what to do.
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"If you really want to hurt your parents and you don't have nerve enough to be gay, the least you can do is go into the arts." - KV
I'm here to chew bubble gum and suck some dick, and I'm all out of bubble gum
Join Date: Mar 2008
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Puke!!!!
I puked in my ex-fiance's mouth TWICE!
Once I was following her home from the bar and had to puke really bad. It came up my throat and was in my mouth by the time I pulled over. I puked for a good 2 minutes, washed my mouth out with some beer in my car but it was like 2 drops from the bottom of the bottle. Got to her house and she met me in the driveway, wrapped her arms around my neck and just fucking frenched the hell out of me. She was drinking vodka all night and as soon as I tasted it, I puked about another half mouthfull right into her mouth!!!
She was so drunk she thought that SHE was the one who puked and apologized to me for it.
The second time was a similar situation where I was WASTED but I was in the process of going down on her. I felt the waterfall mouth begin and tried to slide up her body so I could then get up and run to the bathroom but right as I got to my knees she sat up to kiss me with her mouth wide open to french me deep and it just let the fuck go projectile vomit style.
Needless to say, it completely filled her mouth, went all over her face and scalp and hair. Went all over her bed and pillows and sheets. She runs to the bathroom all freaked out and I never laughed so hard in my life up to that point.
Fucking priceless!!!!!!
BTW, I still fucked her in the ass and the vag while rolling around in the puke later. If it wasn't for the smell, I would definately do it again
I went to a horror movie once with my girlfriend at the time and her cousin. My buddy came with me but had to leave the theater because he was a volunteer fireman. Anyhow, I run to piss about a quarter into the movie and come back and sit down. It's kind of dark and I turn to my left and put my hand on my girlfriend's cheek. I turned her face towards mine and our lips met. We had a very passionate kiss that gave me half a stalk. As I pulled away I realized she had left her chewing gum in my mouth. Then I remembered that my girlfriend didn't have any chewing gum. A couple seconds later, my girlfriend comes back down the aisle, she'd gone to piss as well and left her cousin in the darkened theater alone. We didn't say a word about it to my girlfriend, and later she gave me a blowjob at my girlfriend's birthday party when we were all drunk. That's the best I got right now, kissing is only good as a way to guesstimate blowjob ability in my mind.
-SRD
the first time i kissed my wife, she looked at me and said "your a trumpet player aren't you" i said yes i did play trumpet in band. my question should have been, "how many trumpet players have you kissed to know that so quick" p.s. love her to death, but, woodwind players are terrible kissers. brass players excellent kissers. woodwind players, great blowjobs! brass players, great blow jobs too.
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The whole world is against us dude, i swear to God. - Jay
good for you Lady FrillyBottom - SaucyBastard
Quote:
Originally Posted by pisceschef
CAN TWINKIE NEED MORE ROIDS HAVE BANG SHORT UGLY TAN BITCH MICHELOB
Last edited by Magnusrex : 11-04-2009 at 03:10 PM.
Reason: typo
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"And one time, at band camp, I got a flute stuck in my pussy." I can remember that I always though the flute players were the naughtiest, and their lips are so limber for the timber.
-SRD
I dated a flute player and was very excited at the prospect of getting blown by her. Unfortunately it didn't seem to make a difference. Plus she had TMJ and always complained after a bj that her jaw hurt. Takes the fun right out of it.
__________________ I am a sinner in the hands of an angry god
Quote:
Originally Posted by pisceschef
Too late. The siren song of skinny jeans and skittlerex lured him back to his people. We won't see him for another 3 months.