FOOD - Any recipes, stories, or pics - Page 5 - The Drunken stepFORUM - A place to discuss your worthless opinions

J@ckpot · #41 07-22-2009, 11:02 PM

Bacon Fried Rice

This is my way. Its awesome, but some might consider it a hassle.

Equipment you really should have to make this happen:
Wok (big)
Propane turkey frying rig (for putting the wok on)
Chinese spatula

If youre going to do this right cook up 4 cups short grain rice the day prior. Cover and refrigerate.
If not cook the rice and use it the same day. (Wont stick together right)

Mise en plas:

4 cups chilled rice
Half lb thick sliced bacon (sliced into 1 inch squares)
1 cup frozen peas
1 cup sliced scallions (on the bias you fancy bitch)
3 eggs beaten
2 Tbsp toasted sesame seeds

Soy sauce
Veg oil
Sesame oil

Method:

Heat the wok over the burner until hot. Really hot. If your wok is seasoned well go in with the bacon. If not, see step 7.

Cook bacon until it seems nearly done. Stop before it looks like breakfast or youll overdo it. Remove to a bowl and set aside.

Leave a little bacon fat and add a couple Tbsp of veg oil.

CAREFULLY add rice (to see what happens if you accidentally fumble the bowl and flop the rice in ask me for the pics of my 3rd degree burns.
Of course, I live in Florida and dont wear shoes when I cook outdoors. So Im an idiot)

You have to keep the rice moving. This is like work.

Soy sauce, add some. Dont go crazy.
Then get in with the sesame oil. Probably 1Tbsp.
Keep moving the rice until it begins to brown.

Make a hole in the center and drop in the peas.
Give the peas a minute or so to heat up and mix them into the rice.

Make a hole again. Add eggs.
Scramble them. Mix eggs into rice.

Make another hole in the center.
Add most of the scallions, mix into rice.

Keep the rice moving and taste it. If it rocks add most of the sesame seeds and mix in. If not you may need more soy sauce.

Taste and decide that you like it. Carefully move rice to large bowl.

Garnish with the rest of the scallions and sesame seeds.

There is no step 7, season your pans.

Predator24 · #42 07-23-2009, 04:40 AM

I'm sure it tastes great but it looks like bacon fried BARF!

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ThatHaole · #43 07-23-2009, 01:01 PM

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If you are going to use fancy cooking terms like mise en place in your cooking demos and recipes you should really spell it correctly.

Feel free to shrink your photos too. Just because your fancy 2.1 megapixel camera takes them that big doesn't mean you cannot scale them down.

kthxbai

J@ckpot · #44 07-23-2009, 03:09 PM

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Sorry Ma'am, won't forget that critical "e" next time.

Any other spelling since you proofed it for me? I would imagine so, I wrote it up at midnight last night with a few beers moving.

McHookerino · #45 07-23-2009, 03:16 PM

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Don't you disrespect Pisces like you disrespect you potato salad

J@ckpot · #46 07-23-2009, 03:19 PM

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Who's being disrespectful? It's freakin recipe, don't make it..

ThatHaole · #47 07-23-2009, 03:27 PM

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Actually you fucking tool, if you add a critical "e", it would still be misspelled.

It is simple, if you want to present yourself as a pro with shit like "this is from my cooking demo video" then fucking act like it and proof your shit. Don't do it drunk. If you are just goofing around, then don't act like a big shot.

Maybe it was just an error, if so, whatever. Maybe you are just like every other assclown that thinks he can cook because he went to a cooking school and worked for a year for some unknown. Better yet, maybe you are one of the many "self taught" cooks who sneers at those of us with culinary degrees. If that makes you defensive then fucking get back to McDonalds and start working on your fryer technique.

At least with a resume that highlights IHOP and Subway you won't be a drain on this country's social services.

J@ckpot · #48 07-23-2009, 03:39 PM

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You took my recipes way too seriously. The point of the thread is post a recipe. "Any recipes, stories or pics". Not just perfect ones. My text was supposed to be light. But still allow someone to make the dish. And I don't remember making any claims except to say that the bulgogi recipe card was from a video I made. If you want to trade resumes I suppose we could do that. I'm sure there would be surprises for both of us. And who the fuck is sneering at who?

ThatHaole · #49 07-23-2009, 03:50 PM

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You are right. I never made it past Mise en Plas to see how "humorously" you wrote the rest of the recipe.

Nice pick up on my subtle condensation by the way.

Fever · #50 07-23-2009, 03:51 PM

Jesus fucking christ!!!

Okay Emeril & Flay, don't let those hammer pants ride up too hard.
Lighten the eff up - I was kinda checking this for real food shit, and half expected Pisces to have thrown up some tips.
Nobody is fucking 'right' - just throw out some help for us civilians.