Q: How do you get 1000 babies in a phone booth?
A: Liquify them in a blender.
Q: How do you get them out?
A: Nachos.
Q: What should you do when your baby is stuck in a blender?
A: Use a straw.
Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies?
A: You can't unload bowling balls with a pitch fork
Q: How long does it take to paint a room with dead babies?
A: Depends how hard you throw em.
Q: What's the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby?
A: Dead baby doesn't stick to the roof of your mouth.
Q: What do you get when you mix a dead baby,and a pint of cum?
A: LUNCH!
Q: What do you get when you slit a baby's throat?
A: An erection.
Annnnnd I'm spent.
__________________ I no longer had any use for the porn on my computer. The antidepressants I was on had all but killed my sexual urges. Some might’ve considered this a negative side effect but I was glad to be free of carnal lust. It was difficult to talk to a woman when all you could think about was her delicate proboscis, slender thorax, and perfectly formed egg sac.
Has the odd ability to always find himself under falling anvils.
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Cleveland, Ohio
Posts: 920
Credits: 75,309
Did you hear about Ku Klux Kineval, the racist stuntman?
He tried to jump fifty blacks in a steamroller
Why do black men cry after sex?
Because of all the pepper spray
What do you call a U-Haul truck in Mexico?
A slow cooker
Why should you never run over a black guy on a bike?
Because it might be your bike
What’s the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead black guy in the road?
The dead skunk has skid marks in front of it
How was copper wire invented?
Two Jews fighting over a penny
What do you call a Mexican whore with no legs?
Cunts-way-low
What do football Cheerleeders and Iraqui Women have in Common?
They both Shower after fourth period
How do you fit four Fags on a barstool?
Turn it upside-down
A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his little girl was. He thought about her seeing the wonders of nature through such innocent eyes. Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground. He went over to her to see what work of God had captured her attention. He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating.
“Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?” she asked. “They’re mating,” her father replied. “What do you call the spider on top?” she asked. “That’s a Daddy Longlegs,” her father answered. “So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?” the little girl asked. As his heart soared with the joy of such a cute and innocent question, he replied “No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs.
The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then took her foot and stomped them flat and said, “Well, we’re not having any of that faggot shit in our garden.”
__________________ NOSY LITTLE FUCKER, AREN'T YOU?
Last edited by Kyle E. Coyote : 05-25-2008 at 04:02 PM.
i have seen a vagina, and it was expensive... even with my military discount
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 886
Credits: 6,177
The mayor of San Diego, CA was very worried about a plague of pigeons in San Diego. He could not remove the pigeons from the city. All of San Diego was full of pigeon crap, the people of San Diego could not walk on the sidewalks, or drive on the roads. It was costing a for tune to keep the streets and sidewalks clean.
One day a man came to City Hall and offered the Mayor a proposition.
"I can rid your beautiful city of its plague of pigeons without any cost to the city. But, you must promise not to ask me any questions. Or, you can pay me one million dollars to ask one question."
The mayor considered the offer briefly and accepted the free proposition.
The next day the man climbed to the top of City Hall, opened his coat, and released a blue pigeon. The blue pigeon circled in the air and flew up into the bright blue California sky. All the pigeons in San Diego saw the blue pigeon and gathered up in the air behind the blue pigeon. The San Diego pigeons followed the blue pigeon as she flew southward out of the city .
The next day the blue pigeon returned completely alone to the man atop City Hall.
The Mayor was very impressed. He felt the man and the blue pigeon had performed a wonderful miraculous feat to rid San Diego of the plague of pigeons. Even though the man with the pigeon had charged nothing, the mayor presented him with a check for 1 million dollars and told the man that, indeed, he did have a question to ask and even though they had agreed to no fee and the man had rid the city of pigeons, he decided to pay the $1 million just to get to ask ONE question.
The man accepted the money and told the mayor to ask his ONE question.
He asked, "Do you have a blue Mexican
__________________
Silky Johnston: I'm very upset about what you said about my coat. I made it outta your mother's pubic hair.
Q. What's the best thing about fucking a two year old?
A. Your dick looks MASSIVE in photos.
-What do you get when you dislocate a dead baby's jaw?
Deep Throat.
-A man comes home to find his girlfriend packing her bags. he asks her where she's going and she sobs, "I'm leaving you!"
"Why?!" he asks. "Haven't I been good to you? Taken care of you? Given you everything you wanted?"
She replies, "Well, yes... but... all my friends say you're a PEDOPHILE!"
The man smiles gently and tells her, "Ok, slow down there honey. First of all, that's an awful big word for an 11-year-old to be using..."
-There was a cruise ship that ended up sinking just off the coast of a small deserted island.There where only 3 survivors: 2 guys and a girl. They lived there for a couple of years doing what was natural for men and women.
After several years of casual sex all the time, the girl felt really bad about what she had been doing. She felt having sex with both guys was so bad that she killed herself.
It was very tragic but the two guys managed to get through it and after a while nature once more took it's inevitable course.
Well, a couple more years went by and the guys began to feel absolutely horrible about what they were doing. So...
They buried her.
__________________ IT'S CODE FOR LET ME STICK MY DICK IN YOUR ASS!
Last edited by Carlos Spicy Wiener : 11-25-2008 at 02:34 AM.