Watching Porn with Wife? - The Drunken stepFORUM - A place to discuss your worthless opinions

funktekk · #1 07-10-2009, 08:16 AM

I am considering introducing my wife to porn. We have hit a lull in our sex life and I think it might spark something new.

What do you guys think? Has anyone tried this, and what were the results?

thermos · #2 07-10-2009, 08:25 AM

pm member predator - he's sitting on an assload of videos specifically tailored to this situation.

and welcome, vanilla-sex man, welcome.

did you try pissing on her yet? I haven't had to break out the film in my marriage just yet.

M6cnassv · #3 07-10-2009, 10:10 AM

I say break out a friend, http://shop.tootimid.com/jack-rabbit...FQFqxwodLS0ZnA

Always works like a charm.

funktekk · #4 07-10-2009, 11:36 AM

I guess what I am really hoping to teach her is the art of seduction.

We seem to have a problem with her communicating when she is in the mood.

Like a typical guy I am always in the mood, and like a typical woman she is particular about when and where.

She gets upset sometimes and says that I never want her. She says she asks me for sex all the time, but I don't ever recall. The problem is she is too suddle. She'' say something like, "I'm going to take a nap." Which I should translate into I want to fuck. Even though yesterday "I'm going to take a nap" meant "I am tired and going to take a nap."

I have tried to explain that she needs to be more deliberate, but the message doesn't get through.

I am also hoping to get her more involved in my porn hobby. Not the crazy double anal latex bbw interacial nasty stuff we all like every now and again, or the jacking off to her friends fb pages. I'm hoping to get her into some Wicked or Digital Playground stuff. I would like to share my excitement when I find the latest Jenna Haze flick.

fisher · #5 07-10-2009, 12:18 PM

I don't think porn is gonna work here

What does she think about porn and has she ever watched one with you?

Have you asked her what kinda things get her off?

Predator24 · #6 07-10-2009, 02:35 PM

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Thanks for the dime Therm but this takes confidence and assertiveness.

funktekk, listen to me, watching porn with Mrs. funktekk is NOT going to work and will most likely result in her having an affair with a co-worker. You need to be confident in the fact that you find her sexy and hot and that you want to fuck her constantly or until her fat fucking gut stops jiggling like a bowl of jello. Assertiveness is needed to start the physical fire between her thunder thighs and turn on her fondue fountain.

One you get her to buy into this line of horseshit, you'll be dreaming of the days when you didn't have her waking you up every morning by sitting on your face.

Told you so.

funktekk · #7 07-10-2009, 02:35 PM

She is a pretty liberal gal... she isn't a fan of porn right now, but I don't think she has been exposed to the right stuff.

She does like to go to the strip club with me every once in a blue moon.

As for turn-ons, like most women I have encountered her sparks are situational more than specifics

n2tattoos.lol · #8 07-10-2009, 02:53 PM

i think you need to post a pic so we know what we're dealing with here...

Mr Handlebars · #9 07-10-2009, 03:42 PM

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Well tats, that didn't take long. After all you are the leading therapist here.

Specializing in bullshit, that is.

CTS · #10 07-13-2009, 07:18 AM

I'd probably start with some mainstream racy movies such as 9 1/2 weeks or Wild Things
You could then move on to pornish movies which were more mainstream like Caligula, which have more of an arty angle and a story.
As a general rule, if she doesn't hate porn, she's probably gonna love it.

Oh, and click the play button after a few drinks