Let's get drunk today. Let's get high tonight. Maybe in the morning things will be alright.
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Fucking Kansas
Posts: 3,333
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All I know is I've never seen Twilight or New Moon. I also have never accepted a penis in my mouth, but I guess you and I truly do come from different stock.
I can't fucking believe you came back and admitted it was you right away. Fucking clownshoe
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You know what ten grand feels like in your pocket? It feels like a third cock.
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Originally Posted by n2tattoos.lol
fuck all of you. i'm sending him dick pics.
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Originally Posted by jo_dile
LOL Brodie! You're awesome...and probably high.
I'M STUCK IN A SIG BOX!!! HELP ME! IT'S BRODIEMAXX!!!
As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a grave- side service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the Kentucky back-country.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost; and being a typical man I didn't stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight.
There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch. I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play.
The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. I played like I've never played before for this homeless man.
And as I played "Amazing Grace,'" the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept, we all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full.
As I was opening the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "Sweet Mother of Jesus, I never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for over twenty years."
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It's actually been nice in there, so she doesn't even lock the door anymore. She does however come in occasionally to beat me my ass, but overall, not a bad deal.
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Originally Posted by jo_dile
SLF is very territorial and wont let anyone else in without peeing on em to mark his territory or attempting to hump them.
If you need me I'll just be circling the maternity ward, listening for screams with my glass ready in hand.
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Sasquatch & Serial Killers Cuntry
Posts: 11,561
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Well no one has to try at all. Emos pretty much cut themselves automatically. Most don't cut deeply enough only to get pitiful attention but once in awhile there will always be one who will succeed.
__________________ "I was going down on a chick who was 7 months pregnant when unexpectedly her unborn baby's tiny hand reached out and grabbed my face!"