Post the most *OFFENSIVE* jokes you know

[kingklos]

Q: What does an 80 year old lady taste like?

A: Depends

[Carlos Spicy Wiener]

Q: What's the difference between oral sex & anal sex?
A: Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak.

Guy goes in an adult store and asks for an inflatable sex doll.
Guy behind the counter says, ‘Male or female?’
Customer says, ‘Female’
Counter guy asks, ‘Black or white?’
Customer says, ‘White’
Counter guy asks, ‘Christian or Muslim?’
Customer says, ‘What the hell does religion have to do with it?’
Counter guy says, ‘The Muslim one blows itself up’.

[MrGoutHimself]

Why does it suck to be a black jew?
You always have to sit in the back of the oven.

What do you do when your dishwasher quits working?
Slap the bitch and tell her to get back to work.

Why did the woman cross the road?
Who cares, why was her ass out of the kitchen?

A priest and a rabbi are walking on a sidewalk and pass a playground where a little boy is swinging on the swingset. The priest says "shh, let's go drag that boy into the woods and fuck him." The rabbi replies "out of what?"

If a bird's egg and a black person fall off a tree branch at the same time, which hits first?
The bird's egg, the rope stops the black person halfway down.

What do you get when you cross a mexican and an octopus?
I don't know, but that sumbitch can sure pick some lettuce.

-SRD

[heywoodjablowme]

Frosting

A kid walks into his parents having sex on a couch. The kid asks “what are you doing?” The parents says “baking a cake”.

The next morning, the kid ask “were you really baking a cake?” The parents says “yeah”

Then the kid says “good because i licked the frosting off the couch”

[FortySuz&Two]

Q: what's the difference between a black guy and a large pizza

A: the pizza can feed a family of 4

[MrGoutHimself]

Why don't black people like blow jobs?
Black people don't like any jobs.

Why do german showerheads have eleven holes?
Jews had ten fingers.

How many jews can you fit in a volkswagen?
All of 'em if you put them in the ash tray.

[jizzay]

A gay guy walks into a tattoo parlor and asks the tattooist if he will tattoo his dick. The artist looks at the guy and said for the right price I will tattoo anything. So the guy sits down, drops his pants and the artist asks him what he wants to get there. " A truck" says the man. "A truck? What kind of truck?" asks the artist. "Make it a 4x4" says the man, " I am going muddin!"

[Renshai]

What do you have when you put 10,000 blacks, 10,000 Mexicans, and 10,000 Jews in a ship, send it out to sea and sink it?
A good start.

What do you call a black billionaire physicist?
Nig*er.

What's the difference between a dead baby and an apple?
I don't cum all over the apple before I eat it.

What's a Jewish girls favorite wine? (Say it out loud so it sounds like "whine")
I wanna go to Flooooooooooooooooorida...

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her for being bad?
A) Rearrange the furniture.
B) Leave the plunger in the toilet.
C) Put her out to pasture for a few hours.

What did the blind, mute crippled kid get for Christmas?
Cancer.

What did God say to Eve right after she went swimming?
"Awwww, what the fuck! How are we gonna get the smell out of the fish!"

Why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself?
You would too if your name was "ARRRRRRRRRRRGH!"

What's black, white, and red all over?
Interracial couple in a car crash.

What is red, orange, and blue, and looks really good on hippies?
Fire.

Why is the suicide rate in Poland so low?
You can't jump out of a basement window.

How many WASPs (white Anglo-Saxon Protestant) does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One.

How many old Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
"Don't trouble yourself, I'll just sit here, in the dark, alone."

That's all I got for now.

[hitman912]

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i dont get it

[Kyle E. Coyote]

Jews are cheap.