Ha... along the line of great products, I present:
The Banana Bunker
Here are the answers to some important questions I know you already have:
Q: Will this fit inside my goat fur thong?
A: Unfortunately, that's a question we can't answer with any degree of certainty. It will depend on the size of the garment in question, the stretch of the fabric, and the number of additional items stored along with the Banana Bunker. We suggest that you ask yourself this - would a large banana fit? What about a plantain? If so, the Banana Bunker should fit just fine. If not, we suggest you pick up a Recycled Sailcloth Bag instead.
Q: Would it make a good gift for my girlfriend's mother during the holidays?
A: Absolutely. Since the Banana Bunker makes it easier to eat bananas on the go, and bananas are great sources of potassium and fiber, we're certain that your gift would be interpreted as a gesture of loving concern for her blood pressure, heart function, and digestive regularity.
Q: Can I still use the banana bunker even if I'm regularly taking Cialis?
A: So long as you're using the Banana Bunker in the manner we've shown, your prescriptions should have no bearing on its effectiveness. Anyone who enjoys bananas should enjoy them with the protection of the Banana Bunker.
Q: I see that the bunker works with Chaquita brand bananas. Will it also fit Gorilla's Choice brand?
A: While we weren't aware that Gorilla's Choice bananas existed outside the fictional world of The Simpsons, we think that the Banana Bunker would do an excellent job of serving and protecting Chief Wiggum's bananas.
Q: I don't really like bananas. Will this work with apples?
A: No.
Q: Will this be available in various colors or flavors?
A: At this time, there are no plans to carry any Banana Bunkers outside of what we have right now: Color - clear, flavor - plastic.
Q: Would this help to improve the size of my banana?
A: No. The Banana Bunker can only help you protect what you already have.