Why do people get married? whats the point?

[sevngang]

Weird but my girlfriend and I were just having this conversation the other day over dinner. Mostly because she is convinced we are getting married and I am still waiting for a hotter version of her to come along and basically I like to fuck with her head (don't judge me).

I told her about an article I read about how the marriage rate in Europe is at an all time (as in the history of the modern world) low. Mostly because people see it as an archaic process with no real point. They are evolving the societal standards, just like the dowry went the way of the dodo.

She of course argued that it is a display of two people's love and commitment.

If you view the wedding as a public display of two people's love for each other than there definitely is no reason to do it. You can have a public display of your love without needing a piece of paper and a huge bill. You can be committed without rings.
Then when that love fades, and statistically it will, you can move on, if you elect to, with minimal baggage.

Lets face it if little girls weren't raised to think that their prince charming would be coming along to sweep them off their feet, marry them and they would live happily ever after, there wouldn't be many marriages. Cause god knows no man has ever dreamt of that day.

[Randal Graves]

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Apparently I'm only into superficial chicks who are into shit like flowers, candy, & romance. I shouldn't really talk shit though, because I'm pretty shallow and superficial myself.

[Loki]

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Let me take a shot at answering this burning question, "Why do people get married"
There is such a thing "A soul Mate", there is such a thing as "Love"
That is why people get married, now all the tough MotherFuckers on this forum may stand up and shout "Hell No" thats not it, the fact of the matter is:
"That is It"
Flame me now for being the first one to speak the truth, Thats what it's all about.

[Randal Graves]

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I'm not dumb enough to get into an argument with someone who believes in "soul mates". I have better things to do than waste my breath on a lost cause.

[strommsarnac]

Make sure that you live with each other for at least a year before DECIDING on getting married. Date for at least that long before moving in together.

I've been married for 9 years, we dated for two. Sadly, she was (I mean WAS) my older sister's friend from High School. It was my sister to told us we should date, but when we told her we were going to get married my sister flipped out.

First words out of her mouth - "Shit, you were just supposed to have sex and see movies. You're not allowed to get married!". Talk about an eye-opener for us. They still don't talk. Especially after my sis called us 45 minutes before our ceremony started and asked us to hold off for 30 more minutes. She told me they got lost. I told her tough shit. Understand we got married in my dad's back yard (not redneck thank you) and she was only coming from 15 miles away.

Anyways, we talked about everything before deciding. Especially since she was divorced and had two kids from her previous marriage. We talked with them (7 and 4) and they were part of our vows. They even got rings from me. They're my kids to the point that I got snipped. My daughter tells people she has one dad and a sperm donor who never visits.

Marriage is not all happiness and fun. Sometimes it takes work. It's all about knowing who you are first and then accepting who the other person is. It's about thinking ahead, making compromises and not being selfish. BOTH parties MUST check the ego otherwise it'll never work.

Don't even think about kids if you believe any of those stupid "family planning" books and freak doctors. Those are fairy tale examples. There's so many more things going on.

However, all of that is worth it every time I see my wife or kids smile at me. Every time I'm almost asleep in bed and my wife reaches over and lays a hand on my arm or touch my foot with her's. Every time I hear my kids mumbling stupid things in their sleep. Every time they make me feel dumb by showing me something they've learned that either I've forgotten or never learned. I now understand why most parents are excited about their kids graduation, my son walks this coming June 1st.

I've been on both sides of the marriage fence, but now even though I can imagine being without them, it would be the worst thing in my life if it actually occurred.

[idahotransplant]

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I hate to be the one to break this to you since it really should have been done by your parents years ago, but the Easter Bunny doesn't really exist, and neither do soul mates. Sorry.

[Loki]

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"Easter Bunny"? I didnt see that anywhere in my post. Was that your attempt at sarcasm or just another useless post to boost your numbers?

Either way, glad to see you fucker's finally woke up! This thread was starting to resemble something like General hospital with all the skirts in here!

[Marie-Eve Martinez]

Just a thought:

I made friends with a lady high school teacher of mine during my Senior year. She would let me come to her house and hang out and I got to know her whole family really well.

Her and her (now) husband had been together 20 YEARS and had 3 kids before they decided to get married. They joked that their wedding was more a celebration that they hadn't killed each other all those years rather than some sort of symbol of their union.

I thought that was a really cool way of looking at it.

I don't know if I want to get married.

[buddha00man]

studies have shown married people are over all more happy/content & tend to live longer, im married & watch my single friends date & hook-up & to me personally i think it would get old, marriage may not be for everyone but to those that are selfless it works...much the same way having kids is the ultimate selfless act!

[Wandering]

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Sounds about right. I'm not married, but am in a longer term relationship; My single friends seem to hook-up on a fairly regular basis, but are never really happy. They get the momentary high from getting a hotter girl than before, or one with bigger tits, whatever then it goes away and they are back to being unhappy so they go chase a new high.

As far as marriage goes. There are benefits to building a future with your chosen partner; getting a house, traveling the world, or whatever your desires are. You don't need to be married to do that, but after so many years you'll get branded as common-law anyways so you might as well get the paperwork done earlier and get some of the tax benefits.

The only real big downside I see to marriage is all the laws that are on the books now that make it such a pain in the ass to get out of; if you grow apart it should be simple to go in fill out a form, pay your $25 and have it dissolved. In this day and age there should be no reason for Alimony or any other form of non-child based spousal support.