Has the odd ability to always find himself under falling anvils.
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Cleveland, Ohio
Posts: 920
Credits: 76,573
Jobs I've had and my opinions of them:
Short Order Cook, Pizazzio's Pizzeria: According to the thermometer in the kitchen, it was 110 degrees in there on average. I hated my bosses, and if ONE MORE remedial school dropout called and asked "How long is your footlong sub", "What's on your Meat Lover's pizza" or "How many wings come in your dozen wing bucket" I was going to climb to the top of the water tower across the street with a rifle and start picking people off. I ended up getting fired. My boss bitched me out one too many times one day so I ended up grabbing a doggy bag, walking into the bathroom, taking the shit of a lifetime into the bag, returning to the kitchen and emptying the contents of said bag into the greasy fryer. True story.
Bagger, Buehler's Grocery: We had a pretty small place that catered to old people and retards especially. I couldn't stand it, but I was good at what I did. One night a guy tried to rob us with a switchblade (no money, just a shopping cart full of booze, go figure). I didn't give a shit, it wasn't my booze. Then he tried to push a female co-worker (and a very hot one I might add) into his car. Even though I was only sixteen, I was a black belt in Karate, and that shit was NOT about to happen. I walked up to the guy as calmly as I could, grabbed a wine bottle out of his cart and started WAILING on the stupid fuck with the bottle and, when that broke, my fists as he turned around. If I remember correctly, I broke a couple bones in his wrist, his nose, a rib or two, and knocked out four teeth. Long story short, he tried to sue the store, I was a liability, I got sacked. However, the last eight months of labor hadn't been a total loss, as they DID send me a gift basket. Well, not really a gift BASKET, per se, more of a gift coffee mug with Hershey's kisses inside. Got to nail the girl, though... an almost perfect fairytale ending.
GySgt, US Marine Corps: Did shit I will never forget, never forgive myself for. Took two in the shoulder and upper chest, wounds which hurt whenever it gets cold (which in NE Ohio is about 7 months out of the year). Nearly seven years later I'm still pissing, shitting, sneezing and coughing up sand. BEST JOB IN THE FUCKING WORLD.
7th grade teacher, AI Root Middle School: HATE those little bastards... but I get summers off, so fuck it. I can hold out until retirement. How long can 32 more years really be, anyway?
__________________ NOSY LITTLE FUCKER, AREN'T YOU?
Last edited by Kyle E. Coyote : 06-12-2008 at 01:08 AM.
forgive me father for I have sinned... I have had sexual relations with many many women
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Jersey
Posts: 612
Credits: 4,625
I'm a carpenter and on most days i love it. I tend to lead a somewhat stressless existence since I get to beat the snot out of shit with a hammer all day.
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I've been to three World's Fairs and a goat-fuck, and I've never seen anything like that!
My job isn't that bad, I just help people in the office and over the phone for customers with troubles...and do some servers, backups, maintenance, all that lovely bullshit...but being able to take breaks and go on a drive and enjoy the outdoors, that's all I ask, ohhhh and the minor detail of having DSF access at all times is a fairly decent perk as well
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AshlieH
I know! Doubledip is such a cutie! He looks like a big teddy bear. I just wanna give him a big hug!
Quote:
Originally Posted by jo_dile
He is absolutely adorable.... I agree with you
Quote:
Originally Posted by ms. cellany
I'll third that- way adorable. I told him months ago he's totally my type.
Surgery RN, here. You would think getting to see people naked all day long would be a great job but only about 20% of the time . I do get to see a lot of cool things that most people don't get to see (it's a perk that keeps my job interesting), but some of the people I work with just annoy the hell out of me. Most of the surgeons are cool, but there are a fair share of assholes, too. Not to mention, how many jobs can you wear "pajamas" to work?
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"One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it." - Master Oogway- "Kung Fu Panda"
"You rise, you fall, you're down, then you rise again...what don't kill ya, make ya more strong" - Broken, Beat & Scarred -Metallica