30 Things Every Woman Should

[Mr Handlebars]

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01. Buying clothes from the junior section.

02. Forgetting her parents’ birthdays.

03. Making out with her BFFs at bars for attention.

04. Making out with her boyfriend at bars for attention.

05. Filling her bed with stuffed animals (really, even one is too many).

06. Carrying a torch for anyone she hasn’t seen in the last five years.

07. Rebelling against her parents for the sake of rebelling against her parents.

08. Declaring an entire gender “all jerks.”

09. Holding a grudge against anyone who wronged her in high school.

10. Skipping regular gyno exams.

11. Going to bed without washing and moisturizing her face.

12. Being “that person” who had a bit too much to drink at the office party.

13. Crushing on Justin Bieber.

14. Thinking she’s got it all figured out.

15. Calling her father “daddy.”

16. Engaging in sibling rivalry.

17. Trying to get by on her looks.

18. Living paycheck to paycheck.

19. Expecting a man/knight in shining armor to swoop in and save her.

20. Aimlessly jumping from job to job.

21. Using MySpace to pick up guys.

22. Expecting a man to do all the wooing.

23. Wishing she had someone else’s life.

24. Expecting everyone to drop everything because it’s her birthday ...

25. ... or because her “boyfriend” of two weeks dumped her.

26. Measuring her self-worth by a number on the scale.

27. Being cheap.

28. Quitting a job without having a new one lined up first (especially in this economy!).

29. Blaming her mother for all her issues.

30. Romanticizing her 20s.