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Old 02-12-2011, 07:52 PM
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Expletive Expletive is offline
Cluster-Bomb this MothaFucka!
 

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Director:
Joe Johnston
Writers:
Andrew Kevin Walker (screenplay), David Self (screenplay), and 1 more credit ?
Stars:
Benicio Del Toro, Anthony Hopkins and Emily Blunt

MacQueen: It was about twenty-five years ago now. My pa found him: Quinn Noddy and all his flock. Brains, guts and God-knows-what lying across the moor. And the look on Quinn's face. Like he'd been eaten alive. Whatever did it, it was big, had claws, and didn't mind a load of buckshot. After that, me father went home. He melted down my ma's wedding spoons, and cast silver bullets off 'em. He wouldn't leave the house on a full moon from then on.

That's poetry right there, and it's from an overlooked and underrated masterpiece called Wolfman. Many fuckers brags about the awesomeness of Avatar, and how James Cameron is the second coming, but to them I say nay, and again, thee never; fuck you lot---I say in case they're assholes and don't get it. Avatar was a bunch of donkey shit, 3d and all.
Andrew Kevin Walker who wrote Seven, 8MM, Sleepy Hollow and helped make Fight Club awesome, was definitely the gore master and scene density for Wolfman. Del Toro carries this movie, as he did in Che, even though he was seemingly stronger in Che than he was in this. Though Del Toro carried the movie, Anthony Hopkins owned every scene he was in, and the big revelation half way through wasn't that much of revelation for me, but it was still nicely done. I'll give it a four out of five, well done you lot, well done.


The Tourist

Director:
Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck
Writers:
Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck (screenplay), Christopher McQuarrie (screenplay), and 2 more credits ?
Stars:
Johnny Depp, Angelina Jolie and Paul Bettany

The Tourist, was boring, it was really really boring. Which surprises me because the director clearly loved shooting it, and the writer clearly loved writing the dense scenes. So why was it so boring? Why was it so utterly trivial and pointless? These questions keep me up at night people. Seriously, I don't sleep much.


Scott Pilgrim vs The World

Director:
Edgar Wright
Writers:
Michael Bacall (screenplay), Edgar Wright (screenplay), and 1 more credit ?
Stars:
Michael Cera, Mary Elizabeth Winstead and Kieran Culkin

Why was this movie made again? Seriously, why did they make this piece of shit cinema. It wasn't cool, nor funny, but maybe that's because my heart is onyx, and I who despised Legend of the Guardians and Toy Story 3 isn't the type of person---aw fuck it this was a bunch of shit. It didn't remind me of video games nor anime, nor manga characters, this was just fucking stupid.


August Underground

Director:
Fred Vogel
Writers:
Fred Vogel, Allen Peters
Stars:
Kyle Dealman, Casey Eganey and Alexa Iris

Not funny, not cool, not horrifying, nor terrifying, more like terrible and horrible. The camera work seems as if it was held by a retarded with Hodgkin disease. Don't see it, not because of the subject matter, but because it wasn't executed properly. I've kept a copy of the trilogy so as to remind myself how not to do it. But in contrast, I have Cloverfield on DVD to remind myself of how to do it right.

@Syfy Craig Engler
@DavidvanBrakel That's the series Brad & Robert wanted to create. If we chose a different take it would not have been a Stargate show.
11 Feb via web Favorite Retweet Reply

SyFY claims it's not their fault that Stargate Universe got brought to the table, and it isn't their fault that it was moved to Tuesday night to go head to head with network power houses like dancing, csi and the gay spectacle glee. Of course that's bullshit, and SyFy thought they could win with SGU like they did with SGA when they refused to bring back SG1 and to give Flash Gordon and Pain Killa Jane a chance. And we all remember how fucking awesome Flash Gordon and Pain Killa Jane was. Fuck, I remember when Dr Who with David Tennant ended (it was the first weeping angels episode) and Flash Gordon's episode The Hawk Man began. Now, I've seen some stupid donkey shit in my time, but to see, on Cable television, grown ass actors in a produced bit of fluff, stand around a fire make believing they're hawks going: Awww awwww awwww, fuck me syfy, you canceled SG1 for this shit? So naturally syfy jumped on the SGA band wagon because they felt that SG1 would loose fans in the coming years, and they thought; 'we need to have 2 million viewers,' but lo, syfy, lo, part of Stargates franchise power was that they were shown during off seasons and on Friday night when other Networks didn't have a solid answer for Fridays. But then the producers of SGA saw the awesomeness of BSG and thought they could do that, and decided to do a show where everyone was a universe away from it all (thus serious and shady, at least supposedly), and had nothing going for them other than the communication stones, and the producers loving the idea got excited and hoped that SyFy would carry both shows. But Syfy crying poor mouth, and saying they needed the money to bring better quality shows along the vein of Flash Gordon and Pain Killa Jane to the network, said that the producers had to choose between the beloved SGA, or the unknown SGU. So the producers fearing that after five years, SGA had no where to go, decided to do SGU, and as they say the rest is history. So the producers fucked up, big time. But it was SYFY that killed the show by deciding to bring it to television during regular season, and to move it to Tuesday nights. The show had good ratings Friday nights, dismal, but good. Tuesday nights; the show never broke a million. I never really liked SGU, I got to enjoy it, but I never really broke my back to go and see it. At least, not until the second season, which was much better.
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Originally Posted by MEGADOUCHE View Post
How about the part where "Old Ben" assfucks Leia, and blows it on her fucking cheek? He knew damn well who she was, but seemingly ignores it.:
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