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LOL....wait, what?
Ejaculate for a few days into a medium sized balloon....dress up in a bunny suit.....hide yourself cleverly on Easter morning (caps for reverence)....and when she finds you under the sofa cushion....jump out and pop it on her head? It's what the resurrected Christ would have wanted.
Or buy a cadbury cream egg and stop asking faggy questions on a fucked up forum?