Describe The Nastiest Girl/Guy You've Ever Bagged...
 

I figure that most of you are virgins, but those of you who aren't have probably fucked some pretty disgusting looking people. The real joke in the whole thing is that you are probably the most disgusting person the person you are describing has probably banged...but you still can describe them here!

I banged one guy that I consider lightweight ugly. But at the time of the banging, which happened twice, it was the best sex I ever had. He held that title for almost a year. So I guess he maybe tried extra hard or something. Who knows? I'm far too nice to do this.

don't lie serafina - we all know that your dad was the best sex you ever had

you're such a douche

I lost virginity to ugly skank ho. True story, she was a coal burner and fucked like all the dudes in the apartment complex.
I felt like I should have gotten some of that action too.
the sex sucked. I didn't even come.

I got hammered on JD one night and banged a really fat, sober chick, other than that, I ve been too picky...

All your sisters..... except Jesus's

One time I went to some girl's house that i met online. I hadn't ever seen this bitch before, so i took a friend with me so i had an out. Anyway, bitch was HUGE. I figured i was already there, might as well do it, which was a fucking mistake. I couldnt get off and i had to quit after about 3 minutes because i couldn't keep a fucking hard on. I immediately left and on the way home, i had to pull over to vomit on the side of the road. WORST. FUCK. EVER.

I fucked a guy who had a pretty jacked up face and a really hairy back. The sex was fucking awesome except he blew his load WAY too quick.

I once fucked a guy missing his middle top 4 upper teeth...

which was a bonus in other categories.

I fucked a fat, toothless hooker in the Dominican Republic. Absolute horror it was. First I had to drunkenly barter with a security guard with a fucking sub-machine gun to "utilise" a public space, then on with the rubber and banged her from behind.

It's amazing what you'll fuck if you haven't had any for 12 months.

Anyhooz, I shot my load, pulled out and to my EXTREME HORROR the bag had popped. I barebacked a toothless hooker in a 3rd world country.

Then the bitch started screaming shit about "bambino" or something.

I ran. I scrubbed my cock for at least 45 minutes after that.

can't say that i'm too disappointed with the broads i've been with, or maybe my standards are just lower than everybody elses. there was this one chick though, big gums, i refused to kiss her. gave good head though.

Wow...trying to forget this...
 

Ok, so it was a 4some - 2 incredibly hot chicks...and their but ugliest friend. She looked like she fell on her face, and that's because she actually did earlier that night.

It was like a package deal - the two hot ones more than made up for it. I keep telling myself that as I break out in cold sweats thinking about it.

-ec-

Fat
 

Her name was Jenny, they called her Jenny O Turkey, fat and ugly. Worst part was all friends found out, try telling people Jenny O was a good lay.

I tend to "go ugly early" so I've had some pretty beasty ones.

I had one that's breath was soooo bad it made me puke......but I still nailed her.

I once banged a dude who smelled like a GD skunk! But he had an enormous schlong and he did me fine all night long. So next time I see him, I'll just put a clothespin on my nose while he pops me from behind with that massive dong.

I was 22 and hard up, the was semi ugly and 36, as hard up as I was, I was so hammered, I couldn't get a nut....after THREE HOURS, I passed out. She stalked me for months

did you seriously just say you got a gumjob? what the fuck.

Gumjob is still funny...

*bump* from the wayback machine

I banged one bitch who looked like a horse, she really should have been a lesbian by her looks but i didn't find this out until i had actually banged her because it was at that point i had sweated most of the alcohol out that caused me to fuck her in the first place, i was so disgusted with myself that i had to leave pretty much right after, at 5am heh

I was flying wingman for a buddy and took home a girl that had what I can only describe as briskets strapped to her hips, skinny waist and HUGE tits. She was so disproportionate it was almost comical. I will say this. She fucked like a rock star. I was tanked and kept up with her but I was worn out for about 2 days. I guess when your that ugly you take all you can get when the chance arises.

The next morning I woke up before her, vanished from the house like a ninja.

She's been a good lay for a few years now.

I had called off my wedding and dumped my fiance about 6 months prior. So here I am out with my bowling team partying all night and this chick (all 5'-0" and 250 pounds of her, below average looking) that had been chasing me volunteers to be our designated driver. At the end of the night I am conveniently the last one dropped off, just too loaded to notice next thing I know she got me shorts down and giving pretty good head. I wake up the next morning with her on top... I roll with it, trying not to puke, she finishes up goes to the bath and I bailed. Still don't remember anything of that night and she was telling everybody and anybody about that night. 10 years ago and my friends still bring that one up once in awhile.

About 7 or 8 years ago a buddy and I went to a bar just to get a couple of drinks. There was a girl sitting next to us that was bat shit crazy. Even the bar tenders were a little scared of her. She was mediocre at best. So as I kept drinking I started fucking with her asking her why she was so nuts. I told her that I thought crazy chicks were great in bed and I told her she should come home with me so I could see if it was true. On the way home I am making out with this chick in the back seat and my friend is looking at me in the rearview mirror like I was the crazy one. I can still see the look of disappointment on his face. I got her home, took her upstairs, stripped her down and started banging the shit out of her. As I found out quickly, not all crazy chicks are good in bed. She just laid there and would ask me every 5 minutes if I had a rubber on. I kept telling her “You’re fucking crazy, of course I have a rubber on.” So after I somehow finished, she wouldn’t leave. I tried to get my roommate at the time to get her out of there but she wouldn’t help me. I was in hell. She was dead asleep on my bed which I couldn’t figure out why she would be so tired since she barely moved the whole time I was fucking her. I slept on the couch and got her up at 6am the next morning and told her “I have got to get you the fuck out of here.” I had to drive her across town and she couldn’t remember where her friend’s house was that she was staying at. Between the drive over there and driving around looking for the house it was the longest and most uncomfortable 45 minutes of my life. She “left” her jacket with her money (turned out to be $4) and cell phone in it at my house and asked if we could go back and get it. I told her I would go home and bring it back to her. By the time I got home there were 10 missed calls on her cell phone, all from the same number. As I was checking it there was another call from the same number (obviously her) and she wanted to know if I was on my way back over to drop off her stuff. I told her there was no way I was going back over there and that if she wanted her shit back she could find my house (there was no way because when we left it was pitch black) and dig it out of the garbage.

Since then I have never taken a girl home from a bar.

Never went to bed with an ugly chick. Waking up with one is a whole different story...

Sad but true.

Ahahaha... good find Pen. Gumjob, eh? He was only missing 4 teeth, not all of them... :D

In high school, I couldn't get hot chicks if I paid them. So, I took whatever I could get. This red-headed skank named Nikki offered to fuck me, so I took her up on it. She had a decent face, but she was fat and unclean. She claimed that it was her first time, but having sex with her was like trying to throw a kilbasa down a hallway. And she smelled like the shithouse door on a tuna boat. I had to have 6 beers just to even consider it. I've never, EVER forgotten that night and thank God I never saw her again after high school. After I write this, however, I'm sure I'll run into her. That's just my luck.

Her odor will catch you when you least expect it.

lamo looks like you've chaffed her a bit

The chick I lost my virginity to was pretty hot but she was allergic to anything that made you not stink. She had a decent work around for tooth paste and deodorant but smell from her crotch could make a fly gag. I tried to man up once and she pulled me back up before I got in to the gas plume and said "That's gross" I wanted to say "No shit it's gross", but I wanted to screw more than I wanted to walk home.

See I always thought it was Rosie Palmer not Rosie Backofyourhand.

Early in my 20's, i was kinda shy. I was at a bar called "Cowboys" in Las Cruces, NM. Anyway, i was with my buddy and his girl and his girl's friend.well, his girl's friend was heinous. to make a long story short, i was shitfaced, and the next day, my neighbors were asking me why i brought a yeti back to the house.

I haven't banged any baggers, but I did have a penchant for douche bags (of the frosted tip variety, to boot. Ugh.) I could line up some of the lone-nighters and you'd think it was a growing up gotti promo shot.

*runs off in shame*

always good for a laugh, midge. don't run anywhere!

Hmmm if I were to insult someone I slept with, I'd be in big trouble with BC!

Ohh, do tell!!!